The mystery is great but our model for marriage is found in Christ and His Church…

‘Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church, and gave Himself for her…So husbands ought to love their own wives as their own bodies; he who loves his wife loves himself. For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as the Lord does the church. For we are members of His body, of His flesh and of His bones. "For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh." This is a great mystery, but I speak concerning Christ and the church.’ [Ephesians 5:25-32]

Christ’s love for the church is the model for husbands to properly love their wives. Your role as wife is modeled after the relationship of the church to Christ….

‘Wives, be subject to your own husbands, as to the Lord. For the husband is head of the wife, as also Christ is head of the church…Therefore, just as the church is subject to Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in everything’ [Ephesians 5:22-24].

The New Testament teaching is clear that your husband is your new authority. You are to submit to his authority and respect him in your words and behavior. Just as Christ set His affections on the church to nourish and cherish her, even so your husband has set his affections on you. Respond with love and respect toward him even as the church responds to Christ.

To submit to a perfect man might be possible, but how are you to submit to a sinful man?

If any woman had cause to fear and doubt the goodness and wisdom of her husband it is Sarah. Remember that Abraham gave her up to pagans in fear of his life [Genesis 20]

Notice how the New Testament refers to Sarah…

‘Sarah obeyed Abraham, calling him lord, and you have become her children if you do what is right without being frightened by any fear…’ [I Peter 3:6] How does a wife deal with her fears?

You must maintain your spiritual life in prayer, public worship under the preaching of the Word and fellowship with other believers. Do not let the things of this world rob you of the one thing necessary. We can do nothing on our own, but we can do all things through Him who strengths us. Christ will empower you with grace to do His will.

Always remember Christ. He committed Himself to God who judges righteously when given into the hands of sinful men according to the will of God. He is your hope and your example.



The heart of her husband does trust in her…

‘An excellent wife is the crown of her husband, but she who causes shame is like rottenness in his bones’ [Proverbs 12:4].

You have great power over your husband to do him good or evil. The Proverbs 31 woman is the virtuous wife and precious in the sight of God. Her worth is said to be far above rubies. What makes her so precious?

‘The heart of her husband does safely trust in her…’ [Proverbs 31:11]

She is a woman of faithfulness and integrity and diligence to do good to her husband and to build up her home. He is secure in her love for him. Let this be your goal. Meditate on this: ‘Many daughters have done well, but you exceed them all. Charm is deceitful, and beauty is vain, but the woman who fears the Lord, she shall be praised.’

Your behavior cannot be dependent on the perfection of your husband. Your love must be constant and independent of his sins against you. Let him observe your ‘chaste and respectful behavior.’ This will help build trust in his heart for you.

You are privileged to know the truth and to have seen the truth lived out in the home. Do not succumb to the feminist influences in the culture. You know what the world says, ‘Follow your heart and do your own thing.’ You dare not trust your heart; it is ‘deceitful above all things and desperately wicked’ [Jeremiah 17:9]. The Bible says the wife is a helper, perfectly suited for her husband and his companion for life.

‘Do not let the sun go down on your anger.’ You must believe without doubt that the marriage relationship is the best God has for you. Work at it to make it so. Do not let anything come between you and your husband. Guard your tongue. Never speak disparaging words to your husband or about him.

The honeymoon will end. How will you deal with sin when it comes? There is but one remedy here. Make a bee line to the cross…

‘As the elect of God, holy and beloved, put on tender mercies, kindness, humility, meekness, longsuffering; bearing with one another, and forgiving one another, if anyone has a complaint against another; even as Christ forgave you, so you also must do’ [Colossians 3:12-13].

The power to forgive one another comes from remembering the great forgiveness that Christ has given you in the gospel. If you think on these things, you will be unable to withhold forgiveness. We live with each other in peace because Christ is our peace.

Love is patient and kind and does not seek its own way. Consider others more important than yourself. Love does not consider a wrong done, but covers a multitude of sins; it is not easily provoked. Love seeks what is good, believes what is good, and finds a way to do good. Love never fails, because He who has begun a good work in you will complete it until the day of Jesus Christ. Amen.